Missile alarm- “again? won’t this ever end-continue watching TV and watering my plants”.
Missile alarm 2- this sounds serious, maybe I will check out what’s going on in the shelter. ok-I know. 3/4 of the building, kids playing and screaming, hot as witches’ tit and everyone looking at their cellphone. Going back upstairs.
Missile alarm 3 (middle of the night)- fuck them, I am going back to sleep.
Missile alarm 4 to 9- See #3
Next day-shooting pains in my gums, but not in the same area. Twitch in lips. Very bad itchy back. No “palpable” fear.
Missile alarm 10-in the shelter, daytime. Jesus H Christ, I wonder if the building fell. That was close.
Missile alarm 11-in shelter. “this ain’t no joke”. Still no fear but noise sensitivity developing.
Missile alarm 12-11pm. I am lying in bed. Horrendous fear; shaking from anxiety. It lasts 3-5 seconds, and then, off to sleep. Poor sleep. 3 hours. I am SO fucking tired.
For the rest of the war I am not fearful, just very tired and sensitive to noise. No patience. Anger easily.
It’s over. Itchy back for two more days. My dermatologist (Boaz) says that emotions can make scar tissue sensitive. (from BCC removal)
Then, finally, it’s all over. 9 hours of sleep.
Another beautiful day.